Come Christmas Time


I am one of the odd ducks that happens to be fully ambidextrous and, according to all the tests I took in college, I have a brain that is exactly balanced between the right and left sides of the brain. What this means, actually, is I spend more time figuring out which hand to use to do what task, and I argue with myself on almost every single issue.

Emotions in public embarrass me, so that makes logic a good choice, except emotional people think I am cold and unfeeling because I give a logical response. If others get emotional, with good reason, I have empathy for them, but I probably won’t join them in a crying jag, hysteria, or temper tantrum. On the other hand, or side, I get hurt and angry, and I am capable of having a tantrum, I just usually turn to sarcasm, facts, and downright snobby rhetoric to let others know how upset I am.

The biggest battle I face with myself, is admitting that I am such a softie when it comes to anything to do with children, my family, my country, my religion. I can be brought to tears just hearing the National Anthem, and nothing gets to me like seeing a flag flying against the sky. Only years of self control has kept me from breaking out singing God Bless America at a flag raising. See, Embarrassing.

I love my family. I have the most wonderful children, grandchildren, great grandchildren, and all the steps and add on family that comes with them. I have a husband of 45 years who has grown old with me that I love in more ways than I can say. I am deeply proud of all of them, even the one that has gone on before us brings me pride and joy. I admit, blushing, that when I see them do something that brings them joy, I have to fight tearing up. After all, they don’t want to see an old, weepy lady sobbing all over them. So I have learned to suck up the tears and smile with pride, and enjoy their achievements. Holding a grandchild for the first time is magical, sacred, and fulfilling in a way only a parent can understand. It is a continuation of all that we are. But, I never cry, nor do I laugh out loud, the logic side keeps me under control enough to be excited, but calm. None of that means I don’t feel emotion, I am just more comfortable with keeping it close and personal.

Music brings me to deep emotions, especially music that speaks to my religious being. My country and all that it was founded on is as much a part of me as my name. That patriotic belief comes from my ancestors who both founded the United States, and those that were here to meet the ships as they came in.

So, as I sit here with my fifty-fifty brain, we are once again embarking on Christmas and all it means to me. I secretly LOVE Christmas. I start planning gifts and decorations in mid-summer, and can hardly wait until Thanksgiving is over to begin my Christmas plans. I love the bright lights, glittery decorations, brightly wrapped packages, Christmas trees, baking, and all that goes into it the family traditions that our melded family celebrates. It makes me HAPPY!

On the emotional side, I love the deeply religious meaning of this time of year. The sacred music, the beautiful story of the birth of Christ, the amazing story of Mary, mother of the Savior, and the abiding love of Joseph for both of them makes me feel filled with love and understanding for all other mothers and fathers. Though our struggles may be different, we, as parents, have same love for our children.

This is the one time of the year I tell my logical side to zip it and take a holiday. Oh, I allow it control when it comes to things like planning how much I need of what to get things done, and I allow it free reign with finding the best deals for gifts, but otherwise, it stays out of things. This is the time of year I can cry, laugh, and rejoice without feeling embarrassed, or out of control.

Yep, being one of those few that struggle with an ambidextrous brain and body, is not easy. But come Christmas time, only one side is in control. God Bless You One and All, may your dreams come true, and may you rejoice in all the love of Christmas and all it means.

Stop Saying That!


I was sitting in a café having breakfast this morning when a gaggle of 20ish to 40ish women came in and sat down at the table behind me. They were talking loud and being a bit obnoxious, but I tried to ignore them and read my book while eating breakfast. Soon, however, it became impossible to concentrate because they were talking over each other, squealing, and generally trying to out talk each other. One phrase kept coming up, over and over and over…. “Oh My G-d.” It was used so often I actually started counting the number of times I heard it. In a 25 minute stretch, it was said 44 times by different females, with different vocal expressions. It was used to convey everything from awe to anger, to agreement, to disappointment. It was, quite frankly, annoying beyond words.

I guess that three word phrase is today’s equivalent of earlier generations catch words such as like, you know, just too…whatever. And it is designed to make whomever utters it sound like some empty headed wannabe (another catch word) who has no idea how to make a cogent remark of exclamation.

However, the reason this constant utterance of Oh my G-d bothers me so much is that it seems, well, offensive to those who are Christians. I was taught that to use the word G-d in casual language, or even more so, as part of a swear word, was highly offensive to the Divine. When one calls His name, one is asking for His attention. We say in in reverence and supplication in prayer, we say it in times of dire need for direction or help, we call upon Him in rejoicing and thanks, but we do not simply use His name as an expletive or common exclamation of surprise or shock.

I always remember the prayer of Jesus Christ in the Garden of Gethsemane when he calls out in spiritual agony, “My God, My God, why hast thou forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46, KJV) That is the standard of emotional being that would result in the need to cry out to the Father in such a way. Not just because someone has spoken about a juicy bit of gossip, and everyone responds with equally juicy surprise and avid curiosity for the speaker to tell more.

I recently had an bit of a verbal discussion with a woman who was allowing her children to jump off a retaining wall into a very busy car park. At least I thought she was allowing it. She had her face buried in her phone text messaging. Three other adults asked the children not to jump off the wall because they could get hurt as there was so much traffic. Finally, after the children ignored everyone, I asked where their mother was. They pointed her out. I walked over and told her that her children were in danger of being hit by cars since they kept jumping into traffic, and if she didn’t get off her damned phone, I was going to call the police and let them sort her out. She looked up at me in surprise and said it was none of my business what her children did. I told her it certainly was if I ran over one of them when they ran out in front of me. I calmly started to dial the emergency number, but before I hit send, she screamed, Oh My G-d, what the hell are you doing? I told her, I don’t know what He is doing other than keeping your kids alive, because you are too busy playing on your phone to pay attention to your children. I, however, am trying to get you to be a responsible mother. Then she upped the ante with Oh my F-ing G-d. I responded with the comment that the as far as I knew sex had nothing to do with the conception of Jesus Christ, and the Divine probably wouldn’t have sex with her no matter how much she begged. She threw her hands in the air and stomped off to her car, only remembering to call her children when she was half way there. When I passed her car, she was still texting. And probably using the OMG comment every two seconds. Some times sarcasm is just too intelligent for people to understand.

My point, however, is this. There are many of us who find the causal used of the name of the Divine in common vernacular, to be offensive and rude. Please, just stop and find a better way of expressing yourselves. To me it is just as offensive as being called the N word is to black people. Remember, when you use the word G-d you are asking for the attention of the Father. And if you add the word damn to the first word, you are asking Him to bring damnation down on someone. He probably won’t, but asking him to might bring you more attention that you would care for when you get to the other side. I don’t know about you, but taking on a deity is not my idea of smart.

Demi-gods and Freedom


I believe that everyone has the right to all the freedoms of the land. Because I am an American, I hold those freedoms in great honor. We are a nation built on independent men and women who braved the world and stood fast in their determination to be free in thought, religion, speech, and to do what they must to be happy. To always be forced to put society before one’s family, one’s God, and one’s independence is an abomination to most Americans. Society works because there are laws and checks and balances between the members of that society. It has nothing to do with allowing a government to force the mental enslavement of a people just because whomever is in power thinks they have the right to force others to bend to their will. Therein lies the demi-gods. It is when people are free to choose, to think for themselves, that they are at their best.

Take a look at the so called Dear Leader of North Korea. His country is supposed to be first, but he has turned into an evil tyrant because there are NO checks and balances on his behavior. He is a true sociopath whose evil knows no bounds. Were his people free to refuse to obey him, he would have long since been executed for the killer that he is. It is not all that different from what Hitler did to Germany, only his victims were Jews, Catholic Priests and nuns, homosexuals, gypsy, and anyone that he felt was sub-human. Negating the individual in favor of the society always leaves the leader of that society free to do what ever he or she wishes. All their personal hatred for a person or persons can be indulged in the most inhumane way possible. And of course, those in power will do their best to stay in power in order to control their world.

Without freedom, people have nothing but slavery to the system. Socialism, Communism, Dictatorships, all remove the individual from the formula that creates a robust society. In time, the people give up, stop trying, stop thinking for themselves, and simply plod along through life without hope of a better future. At the expense of independent freedoms, no one will ever be able to become more than what their society allows. That is why so many countries without freedom become third world countries in a few generations. Look at Cuba, and even Russia. (Russian people outside of the larger cities, and even within many of them live third world lives.) Those in power have all the money and riches, not the people. And people certainly don’t have the freedom to find a way to make more or do more unless they do it illegally.

Growth in humanity and their society happens when the individual takes the future into his or her own hands and makes something more from it. Scientist, medicine, flight, inventions, all sorts of new and impressive life saving inventions, including transportation and roads, have happened because people were free to imagine, dream, and then create what comes from that ability to dream. It is the independent individual businessman who comes up with a new idea or way to do something and then makes it available to the entire world that becomes wealthy, not the leaders or government in charge who hordes the inventions and ideas of the people and keep them for the elite or government – or even sell them at a profit and keep the money for themselves.

Because the United States is built on a unique platform of a republic, and because our country was founded by religious fanatics, criminals, and those desperate for a new start, or at least a chance at success, we have a mix of robust, determined, hard headed people who are drenched in common sense, and a dedication to individuality. It is the elite of the decidedly liberal progressive academia who want to “fundamentally change” that which is sacred to the American people. Steeped in self loathing clothed in the rhetoric of high minded tripe, they seek to tear down that which they cannot understand. It is they who must be the leaders, because they know best. It is they who must have and keep the wealth, because the sub-humans around them simply do not have the ability to understand what is best for them. All people, no matter who or what they are, happen to fall beneath their sanctimonious and bitter idea of leadership. In short, they want us to be China, Russia, or North Korea instead of the great country we were, we are, and will be.

I can pretty much guarantee another civil war if the progressive liberals keep pressing to change our fundamental and sacred rights as citizens of the United States of America. Progressive Leftists like Hilary Clinton and her ilk, have, indeed awakened a sleeping giant. Other than the elite academia, the actors from Hollywood, and those under their thrall, most of us in this country still believe and stand firm in the Constitution of the United States of America, and always will.

A Choice To Make – If you are not religious, skip this. I will not entertain any nonsense.


I had the strangest dream last night. I tend to dream entire books, and odd things like showing up for an appointment late and in inappropriate clothing, like wearing my nightgown to the office. But this dream was different, because it was about a metaphor from the way we live life, and the way the Hebrews lived life in the shortly after the death of Moses.

All of us know the story of Joshua and the fall of the walls of Jericho. If not, here is a short summary.

Battle of Jericho – Story Summary:

The battle of Jericho featured one of the most astounding miracles in the Bible, proving that God stood with the Israelites.

Featured image

After the death of Moses, God chose Joshua, son of Nun, to be the leader of the Israelite people. They set about to conquer the land of Canaan, under the Lord’s guidance. God said to Joshua, “Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

 Spies from the Israelites sneaked into the walled city of Jericho and stayed at the house of Rahab, a prostitute. But Rahab had faith in God. She hid the spies from the king’s soldiers, and when the time was right, she helped the spies escape out a window and down a rope, since her house was built into the city wall.

Rahab made the spies swear an oath. She promised not to give their plans away, and in return they swore to spare Rahab and her family when the battle of Jericho began. She was to tie a scarlet cord in her window as a sign of their protection.

Meanwhile, the Israelite people continued to move into Canaan. God commanded Joshua to have the priests carry the Ark of the Covenant into the center of the Jordan River, which was at flood stage. As soon as they stepped into the river, the water stopped flowing. It piled up in heaps upstream and downstream, so the people could cross on dry ground. God performed a miracle for Joshua, just as he had done for Moses, by parting the Red Sea.

God had a strange plan for the battle of Jericho. He told Joshua to have the armed men march around the city once each day, for six days. The priests were to carry the ark, blowing trumpets, but the soldiers were to keep silent.

On the seventh day, the assembly marched around the walls of Jericho seven times. Joshua told them that by God’s order, every living thing in the city must be destroyed, except Rahab and her family. All articles of silver, gold, bronze and iron were to go into the Lord’s treasury.

At Joshua’s command, the men gave a great shout, and Jericho’s walls fell down flat! The Israelite army rushed in and conquered the city. Only Rahab and her family were spared.

**********************************************************************************************************************************************

My dream picked up where the army had started marching around the city, with only the priests blowing ram’s horns. I was standing on a hillside with several other people, one of whom was a sort of teacher. As we watched, the people of Jericho stood on the wall laughing and jeering at the Hebrew Army. They were throwing rotten food and rotten meat at the men as the marched, but other than the priest’s noise, the Hebrews were silent and did not so much as look up at the wall.

I assumed this was the sixth day of the march, because after they were done, they all went back to their encampment and settled in for the night. While the people inside the walls were celebratory and such, the Hebrews still remained quiet. I asked the teacher if they knew what was going to happen the next day, and he said that some did, but most did not. However, they trusted that Joshua and God knew what to do, so slept peacefully.

At that point, I pondered about following God’s plan, even if it didn’t make a lot of sense. Soldiers are trained to fight, it must be a very frustrating thing to be prepared to do so, and yet being told to simply march and stay quiet. I know that every soldier I know would be frustrated at not being able to do what they are trained to do. Then, a metaphor sparked in my mind about how we, like the soldiers, often have to slog through miserable times, not knowing why, but trying, with all our inner strength, to keep moving – even if stopping and taking a different route would make us feel better.

Because we are trying to follow God’s plan, and not our own or that of mankind, we know we just have to keep going. Some of us will, but some will simply walk down another path because it is easier. They think that eventually they will go back to the path they know God wants them on, but what they don’t know is that the further they go down the path of man, the further they diverge from the path of God. The apex never comes back together and they will have to find a way to cross from one path to another – and that will mean a long hard battle across no mans land. Each crossroad will be a decision that can take a person further away or toward the main path, and those decisions will make all the difference in their lives.

The next day when the horns started blowing and the Hebrew Army started circling the city, the citizens of Jericho were on the walls, as usual. But when the army kept marching after the first time around, they sensed something was going to happen, however, until the army showed signs of a willingness to fight, they wouldn’t do more than throw things and jeer. After the seventh round, all of us held our breath as the great shout went up from the soldiers, and the walls fell, allowing them to enter the city and slay all but the prostitute and her family.

This brought to mind the issues of following commandments, even when it seems there is no purpose to do so. Everyone else is breaking the rules, and seem to get away with it on a regular basis, but if we break the rules, we will fail at the task set before us when we came to earth to gain our place in eternity.

I think the whole issue of, “it isn’t fair” needs to be tossed out of our lives. Nothing was ever said about fair, as each of us is supposed to be on an individual path. Since we are not competing against anything but ourselves, what does fairness have to do with anything? There are people in the church, however, who feel that they must qualify as experts in everything including how others live the gospel. You know them, the members who complain because things aren’t done their way, or the Utah way, or the way we have always done things. It is those kinds of people who drive off a lot of members with their constant criticizing and finger pointing. God sees us as individuals with individual lessons to learn, and individual paths to explore. Why can’t other members remember that?

At the end of the day, those who survive turn themselves over God and live His plan. Our obedience and willingness to take the harder road to redemption and salvation keeps us in play for our full potential being accomplished. Those of us, myself included, who wander from the road God set before us, just add to our difficulty by trying to take the short cut, or easy way, in life. And end up at the crossroads filled with peril and discordance with The Lord.

The adversary wants us to suffer that discord because chaos in our lives gives him power to overcome the rules set before us as children of God. He wants us to take the path of least resistance so he can put obstacles in our way, tripping us with every step forward. Although the path may look smooth, the pitfalls are well hidden until we fall. Strict obedience to the laws of God help us to remain strong within the perils of life. But straying too far will leave us unprotected and destitute in spirit.

In my dream, I stood with Joshua and his army on the hill over Jericho, seeing the thousands of people who had died in defiance of the laws of God, and the debauchery that brought about the downfall of the wall. That wall represents the Lord’s protection from the things that would harm us, it also represents how living with in it can tear away our decency and let us be burdened with blood lust and hate.

We must stand firm in what God wants us to do, follow orders, stick with the plan, and deal with the bumps and dips in the road before us, even if it feels constricting. We may want to do it the easy way, but there is no easy way, only God’s way and the adversary’s way. Our choices are what makes the path in front of us straight, crooked, or short. Are you obeying God’s commands, or are you doing to try to do it on your own? Make a choice.